


I made your tea, so come back home

by minoshat



Series: Toy [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, M/M, and levi calls eren "brat" a lot and it's in a very sweet way, levi gets emotional as well, lots of not send letters, major character possible death, missing person, moments when writer is way too emotional about work, so you were warned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-07
Updated: 2017-04-07
Packaged: 2018-10-16 03:27:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10562742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minoshat/pseuds/minoshat
Summary: Levi promised to write letters to Eren, while he is away. He must have lost his mind. He is not a poet. And he is definitely not getting soft and emotional. Maybe just a little bit.Collection of letters Levi wrote to Eren and one letter Eren wrote to him.





	

**Author's Note:**

> It's such a pleasure to be a newcommer to this fandom and this perfect ship. Song inspired: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SWww880E9wU
> 
> Yeah, I'm emotional.  
> It's a sad story.  
> Last warning.

 

 

_Your hand so small_

_Held a strand of my hair So strong_

_All I could do_

_Was keep believing_

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

_Eren Jeager,_

_As promised I will write to you. I’m not really someone to share things, but promise is promise. Honestly I have no idea what I’m supposed to write here.  I’m at the first meeting point. 3 fucking titans down. I took a shit. Tea here tastes worse than mud. It was a shitty day. Shittier because annoying you is not here._

_Levi_

_PS: 15 kilometers away from you._

_PPS: Clean your uniform properly just like I did till now for you, brat._

 

 

 

 

_Eren,_

_It’s funny how I write to you every day.  It became habit of mine to stare at the blank page trying to imagine your face. I don’t know even if you will get to read any of them, but I write them anyway. I remember you being curious what is there far away from the wall. Well it’s just more shitty, more titans, more ways to fuck up… It should be depressing, It should make me want to turn around and hope to see Walls, strangely it’s nothing like that, for the first time in a long time I feel more free than I’ve ever been, more alive. I can’t seem to stop wondering how this world would taste without fuckers trying to eat us. Yes, tea is still shit._

_Levi_

_PS: 80 kilometers away from you. Probably._

_PPS: Brush your teeth, brat._

 

 

 

 

 

 

_Dear Eren,_

_I promised to write to you every day. I do. I write each day. It’s just today we encountered really strong titan. And we lost. A lot. We can’t go back to bury them. So we just left them. On the ground. Some were still breathing I’m certain of it. But we couldn’t slow down, we couldn’t take anyone. So we run. Until now, we were on the run. From Titans. From their dead stares. Night is dark here. Darker than in the city. Yet I still can see them all ripped apart.  It’s cold here. Wish I could share blanket with you as we used to._

_Levi_

_PS: I lost my count._

_PPS: Eat proper dinner, brat._

 

 

 

 

 

 

_My Eren,_

_I lost account how many days I’m away from you. It’s been three months? Hanji said it’s mostly accurate. I thought it’s been years. Did you grow up a little since I’m gone? I’m sure you did, though you promised you wouldn’t, little shit.  Night is finally falling. It’s getting harder and harder to fall asleep. It’s even harder when you are hiding under my eyelids. Your hair still messy, eyes still in the color of the forest, and your smile… It’s annoying really. Just so you know tea ended. Now it’s just mud with horse shit. You’re sure missing things._

_Levi_

_PS: Somewhere between rock and Titan’s shit._

_PPS: Change sheets, brat._

 

 

 

 

 

_Dearest Eren,_

_It raining. All day long. It’s like god finally decided to pee on us once and for all. We found some old ruins. Nobody is counting, nobody checks for missing. I’m trying not to see more empty spaces when we are sharing food. Maybe it’s just me but rain is so loud or it’s just not that many voices left. We’re so close to the destination. Erwin says only two days left. I don’t argue with him on that. Everything is wet and smelly. I hate it, but no one seems as concerned as me which is even more annoying. On nights like this I think of how you smell, how warm your body was beneath mine, the texture of your lips – do they still remember me? Two days._

_Yours,_

_Levi_

_PS: Look at the east, I’m here looking back at you so don’t feel lonely._

_PPS: Sleep well, brat._

 

 

 

 

 

_Dearest Eren,_

_There’s nothing there. Nothing. It was all pointless. Everything.  Nothing. I’m not even surprised. It was never in our cards to get anything, to achieve anything. Just another bill from fate we overpaid with youth and blood. I would laugh, but my voice strangely lost it’s strength. Hanji on the other hand is laughing hard. She went mad most probably. No one stops her. Maybe we’re all insane, maybe it’s just that world became suddenly too cruel.  The ground is shaking or those are just my legs? Erwin said we’re going back._

_I’m coming back. To you._

_Yours,_

_Levi_

_PS: Wait for me. I’m coming home._

_PPS: Prepare hot tea, brat._

 

 

 

 

 

 

_My dearest Eren,_

_Sun was shining all day long. Maybe it’s mocking wasted travelers, who are coming home with nothing but deaths behind their shoulders. I openly gaze at the sun, but the more I stare the more darkness it cause to appear in front of my eyes. I don’t stare anymore.  The more time we spent in the open more my skin turns brown. Would like it now? It still can’t be compared to the sun kissed skin of yours. I remember that hunger of your eyes when you were looking at me thinking I wasn’t looking. I regret now all those times when I actually did looked away. What was I thinking? There is no better view than you. This world is just shit._

_We’re short on food. With each day it’s less and less people to feed, so for pure irony it might be enough. On my comment Erwin didn’t say anything. Lately he is not say anything. After all what is there left to say._

_Yours,_

_Levi_

_PS Closer to you. With each breath I’m getting closer to you._

_PPS: Buy more food. You will cook something good for me, brat._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_My precious Eren,_

_Your name seems dead on my lips, so after so long I tried to say it out loud. I’m whispering it now, can you hear? Please, tell me you hear my silly whispers before you fall asleep._

_Eren, Eren, Eren…_

_It’s causing such a sweet sensation in my stomach, just your name, almost as sweet as our first kiss. Remember it? Invitation your eyes sent to me that day, your warm breath, soft lips, I think of it often these days. I plan to kiss you many times. So many you will beg me to stop. So many you will forget about all those times I wasn’t there to do it._

_I’m still getting something to eat two times a day, when other’s barely get one in two days. Erwin said it’s because I’m their strongest and strongest must eat well. I close my eyes to not see hungry looks. I close my eyes swallowing hard thinking of you waiting for my comeback. With that I take another bite._

_Yours,_

_Levi_

_PS Just a little more._

_PPS Clean the house, I’m coming back, brat._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_My precious Eren,_

_We’ve finally reached the closest point to the walls. I see them clearly now. It’s strange to be this close yet so far from them. From you. We’re stopping for the day, only few of us still alive, but at night we will go for the walls. Finally I will see you. How many months passed since we last saw each other’s? Are you still waiting? I wish I had spent more time with you when I had a chance. It’s stupid how I believed in that illusion of future, of time that we will be eventually granted. I don’t believe in it anymore. I’m putting all my bets on you, on now, on the moment we will meet again. For now I stare at the walls. Are you sleeping now, right? Or are you feeling that I’m coming and can’t rest at all? Are you waiting for me? Are you worried? Don’t be. Please don’t be. Tomorrow I will have you in my arms. That’s all that matters._

_Yours,_

_Levi_

_PS: Please wait. Just few hours._

_PPS: Don’t prepare anything. Just be there when I arrive. Just be there, brat._

 

 

 

 

_My precious Eren,_

_This will be the last letter. I promised to write every day and God is the witness that I did. I didn’t break that promise, but I’m afraid you will think I did. I don’t know if those letters will reach you, if anyone survive… I hope they somehow will reach you. I planned to give them to you once I will be back…_

_That promise…_

_I can’t keep it…_

_Forgive me Eren…_

_I imagined for so long by now the moment I will see you again. Remember all the times we talked about our dreams, about freedom, about greatest things we swore to throw our lives for… I regret I never told you but you were there, in my dreams, I dreamed of how our lives would be like after all of this I should have known better to not believe in fantasies but to keep you closer while I could. Please carry on our promises, our dreams. No, carry on your dreams. It’s my last order Eren – live happily._

_Yours,_

_Levi_

_PS: I love you. Always._

_PPS: Don’t wait for me, brat._

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

_Dear Levi,_

_You promised me you will write to me, yet no letter has come to me. Did you forget our promise? No, you wouldn’t. You will eventually give them to me, right? It’s been a year since we bid our goodbye at the gates.  You went to the world behind the walls and I couldn’t follow you. I wish I had kissed you that day, but you’re not a tearful goodbye person, aren’t you? That’s why you are always coming back, right, because you never said your goodbyes._

_I miss you. A lot. I’m doing well. I brush my teeth and clean my uniform. I change my sheets along your routine. I even brew your favorite tea, so when I’m closing my eyes it’s like you never left._

_Levi…_

_How are you doing? Are you hungry? Are you scared? Are you lonely? You’re always on my mind, so don’t be, please. There’s not a day passing without me waiting near the gates. If you can, please, come back quickly. There’s still many more promises we haven’t fulfilled, so many dreams we have yet to achieve. I will tell you in secret, you’re in all of them. I’ll put this letter along others on your bed – come quickly it’s hardly any place left to put them. I will write tomorrow again. I will write till we met again._

_Yours always,_

_Eren_

_PS: I love you._

_PPS: Please come back home._

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> It's a sad story, but in small attempt I decided to not give it final ending, rather open one - let's try to be hopeful as much as Eren is. This is such an amazing manga, amazing characters - I fell for them recently but I feel like their stories really hit right through my heart and they will stay there. It's my first work for this fandom - pls give me your support, leave comments. Sadly it's not beta-ed.


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